Ninja energetic secret to getting what you want…

Has this ever happened to you?

You walk in a room and feel overwhelmed by energy or feel like you need to sit on the sidelines.

You walk away from a situation feeling like you just got taken advantage of.

You walk in feeling one way and leave feeling another. That is really the root of what I’m talking about. You know the times when you think you have it all together and you fall apart.

You agree to something you didn’t want to.

You didn’t say the things you really wanted to say or engaged when you didn’t want to.

I have had it happen lots of times to me over the years. I mean before I learned law of attraction I feel like this was just common life for me. I was never the dominant energy in the room. I was always a side note. I was always wishing it was this way but it was that way. I was always searching for my power.

Then when I started to learn energy I realized that the way things worked mattered. I could literally use energy to my advantage instead of always just adjust to what was going on around me. I was used to life living me. This gave me huge hope to change my life.

The process I am about to share with you is one that is simple but so very effective. You can use it in every situation and the effects will be felt if you are consistent and precise and tune in.

When I say tune in, I mean FEEL it. Really take time to work that mental muscle to produce an emotion. If I haven’t told you before, emotions are what creates. They are the engine. The better you get at evoking emotion, the better your energy will be and your outcomes and opportunities will be as well.

So have you ever heard the term, “Become the dominant energy in the room”? It sounds awesome right? You are in charge. We all want that, right? The problem is that we humans like to take that and make it a physical thing (i.e. bossy fuckers). But bossy won’t get you the results that energy will. You gotta be willing to let go of the outside and tune in to the inside.

Because you can only control so much on the outside. And it is a lot harder to do. But when you are aligned then everything has to acquiesce to you. It has to. It is a law of the Universe. There is no way it doesn’t….because energy is EVERYTHING. So when you are aligned energetically you are running the show. The circumstances bow down.

I know you’ve heard about visualizing. The top athletes do it to prepare for competition. In fact, a study was done and noted in one of Dr. Joe Dispenza’s book that talks about how visualizing with the proper technique actually affects your body. So if you could mentally KNOW you were working out while sitting on the couch eating chips your body would respond to the work out. When I get this one down pat I will let you know lol

So there is a concept I learned from the very early teachings of Abraham Hicks called “pre-paving”. Pre-paving is the same as setting your intentions. Do you set your intentions? I do. Every day. But this takes it a step further.

Pre-paving is really being very present and thoughtful. It is a powerful method for sending your energy out ahead of you can telling the Universe exactly what you want to happen.

Because remember, law of attraction is the creating of opportunities that meet your energetic make up. That is the basis of it. So activating all the possibilities you would like to happen makes so much sense and trust me, it is POWERFUL!

I’m not saying you will get every single thing you want but I mean, why not? It works like crazy for me for everything from meetings with potential clients to shopping to being at events (where I seldom want to go lol).

So what do you do? You take a breath and center yourself. Then think about what you are going to do from that present moment. Going into a party? Heading into a job interview? Going to a family event that usually has drama?

Okay. Think about it and first recognize that you get to have what you want. You do! That is real and true. So claim that. Just by claiming it you activate the truth of it in your energy. Now, decide how you want the event to go. SEE it going that way. Imagine how you will feel during the interaction. My favorite is to imagine how I feel walking away from the interaction.

By activating those feelings just prior to the event while in the present moment you are more likely to experience the possibilities associated with those feelings. And you will start to notice things working out perfectly for you.

For instance, say there is a person at an event and you have had problems before and now you want to go to this event and have done the energetic work. Well, the “opportunity” to see that person will be lessened. Maybe she goes to the bathroom right when you walk in and then maybe she is whisked away outside to deal with something just as you go to the room she was in.

That is how the Universe works. It matches you on every level of energy you put out. And when you know it, not believe or hope, but KNOW it then you get to have what you want. The juicy stuff is between believing and knowing.

So as you keep on playing this game and pre-paving you are not only making situations go more smoothly for you but you are also training your energy. It’s a two for one that has huge impacts if you are serious and ready to do this work!

We are so powerful and these little things we can do throughout our days can really add up to a lot when we are consistent and purposeful with our focus and energy!

xx Rebecca

http://www.shesunoffendable.com

How to have a SIX FIGURE Soul Year.

Have you ever had a SIX FIGURE Soul year? You may be asking what the hell a six figure soul year even is. I get it. It’s a name I came up with when I found my happiness, my inner joy, my real connection. SIX FIGURE soul years always stem from passion and being aligned with your highest well-being. Before I had my son I had plans. I had read about Sudbury schools and I wanted to send him to one really badly. Or Waldorf school. I had read about them too. See, my exposure to Law of Attraction at 19 really opened up the possibilities for me. I knew that I did not want to raise my son the way I was raised and the way most kids are raised. To each her own but for me, I wanted to have more energetic influence over my kid than teachers and other kids. I was also convinced, and still am, that child led learning is not only more effective, it is more fun and done in far less time. So this was an innate desire for me. Fast forward and my son was one when we go through this crazy situation and my husband is arrested after a family vacay for a crime he didn’t commit. He is later found guilty and sentenced to life without parole. It was devastating and changed what I thought was possible for a little while. I thought I was doomed to be the single mom you see on TV. Latch key kid, mom who is overworked and a broken relationship. But then I realized who the fuck I was and I was determined more than ever to create a different set of opportunities for my son. Eventually I ended up taking a voluntary severance from my cush job with amazing insurance and vacation and sick pay to jump into real estate with my Mom. She suggested it and it sounded like a good idea so we went with it. Little did I know this would create the opportunity I was looking for. Sometimes we have to let go of what we ask for in order for it to pop up and just continue moving. That’s what I did. And then the opportunity appeared. After I had written my first million in about 6 months I decided to take my son out of school. Now, everyone else thought it was crazy to get into real estate. Everyone questioned how I would make it. By this time I had already used LOA to create a job paying double the amount of the job I had when my husband was arrested so I knew I was powerful (like we all are) and I know if I wanted it, there was a way for it to manifest so I wasn’t as worried as everyone else. When I decided to take my son out of school everyone thought I was crazy too. And I had my doubts but they were far outweighed by this solid knowing that sat in my solar plexus and told me I was moving directly towards exactly what I had energetically set up long before. I had somehow created exactly what I wanted. But how? That is the question. After studying law of attraction for almost 30 years (that feels really old to say lol) I can tell you how. The first thing you have to do to have a six figure soul year or begin to make them your standard way of life is to figure out what you want. That’s right. Sound’s crazy doesn’t it? It’s like, come on Rebecca. I know what I want! I want to be happy. But what does that look like? Well see what happens a lot is that we allow our lives to be dictated from the outside in. So and so needs this, she would want me to do that, my kids need this, my job is this, etc. We start deciding we can’t have what we want before we even start dreaming. But what if you kept dreaming while you were still living? I mean here’s the thing, you can’t always get there all at once. But moving towards it is half the battle. Because the truth is the Universe never forgets your dreams. Not the ones you REALLY want. All of that is hanging out waiting for you to energetically get in range of those possibilities. But we get distracted. We start looking at what hasn’t manifested. We start to let our fears and lack talk us out of what we want. Because, life is supposed to be a struggle right? You don’t always get what you want, right? Well, a SIX FIGURE soul year is when you decide to want everything you get. You decide that things are working out for your highest good. You decide that you can have exactly what you want and refuse to deviate. I teach this concept in class and it’s one I learned from my early learning from Louise Hay. When I would want to just be soothed and feel better I would pull out her 101 Power Thoughts and listen to it over and over. In fact, I would not listen to anything else when I was in the car. And it would soothe me to the point I was able to find my energetic footing again. Because many times we forget. We forget what we wanted. We get so focused on what we don’t want and how we don’t like it that we forget what we want. I mean not really, because you can’t but on the level that the information is available to you, you forget. You are in an energetic cycle. That cycle will keep you spinning and you have to be willing to stop it. Because the longer you keep it spinning the further it is taking you from what you actually want. So one way I learned to stop that cycle is with affirmations and some good ole determination. When I am walking towards something I want and it seems like fear is trying to creep in because it doesn’t LOOK like it’s happening I say these timpl words, “I refuse to scare myself”. Simple right? It is. And then I redirected. This process is one you have to learn to do and be willing to do when fear pops up to keep you stuck. The last piece to the puzzle is to pull out all the old beliefs of what you have to do and who you have to be and decide are those about you or someone else’s beliefs? Do you believe you have to do xyz or did someone else tell you that? Do you really want what you think you want or do you want it because of what other people want for you or maybe even what other people have? I had to release the ideas others had. When no one (well practically no one) agrees with your decisions you have to get solid in your own ideas. Building up what you believe is possible and what you believe it takes to get there is essential. Why? Because those are the parameters by which things will flow to you. The more complicated you make it, the more difficult is it. The easier you make it, the easier it is. So what does your six figure soul year look like? What would it look like to you if you were just doing exactly what you want? What are your priorities? What feeds your soul? Do those two things match? Are they in alignment? What I have found with my clients is that these do not match and that is causing this discombobulation in their energy. You have to be doing what you think you should be doing. You have to be at peace with how you spend your time. You have to be living in line with your beliefs if you ever want a SIX FIGURE soul year. You are and always have been searching for the connection to YOU, to God, to your higher self. That is where soul years happen. When we find the joy from within instead of looking to fill it with all the outside trappings. Don’t get me wrong, those things are amazing and will come regardless. But are they creating more joy or a noose around your neck that is slowly and silently suffocating you? These are all the questions you have to decipher. Because listen, it’s easy to do what you’ve always done and stay where you are. What if you started to do something different? Because six figure soul years are why we are here. We are here to expand energetically and every time we allow more joy we become more of who we really are. Here’s to your first or next SIX FIGURE Soul Year! xx Rebecca

Black Lives Matter. White Privilege. Energetic Alignment.

Everyone is talking about it right now. Rightfully so. White privilege. Black Lives Matter. George Floyd and the numerous death before his at the hands of police. How to come together as a country. I have been very vocal about how I feel about the situation. As you may or may not know my love affair with my black husband started 30 years ago next year. Twenty one years ago this beautiful biracial child was born that change my life forever. Being in the south both of these events were life changing.

Let’s first talk about white privilege and what it means and how to wrap your mind around it. White privilege is not about any one actual white person alive today. It is about how our society was built and has continued to run. It is not accusing you of being racist if you are white. It is not accusing you of doing anything actually except living in a system made that favor you solely based on skin color. When you depersonalize the message it makes more sense.

I am not saying that people do not play into the hierarchy that is surely there. But I am saying you can choose to not be offended. You can choose to be part of the solution. You can choose to not make it about you. Yes, we have all had hard stories. Yes, we all have to deal with life. But by looking at the stats on paper, it is harder when you have brown skin. The pay is less and the interest from police is much more.

Black Lives Matter asks you to pause and reflect on how you may be contributing or if you feel you are not then at least acknowledge the system for what it is. Can you imagine being gas-lighted you whole life? Gas lighting is when you tell someone that what is obviously true is not true. It made me feel crazy as a kid when this would happen and still does today. I can only imagine if my whole life I was told by society at large, “we love you. we are not racist. You are welcome. This is your home too.” only for reality to show you a much different truth day in and day out with covert and overt racism systematically being dispensed.

So the request to acknowledge is not for a white person to bow down (as some have hinted or flat out said). It is just to validate and say, yes, I see this problem too and I will no longer ignore it for my comfort at your expense. It does not mean you can change the world. It means you agree to be compassionate and empathize with a centuries old issue that will never go away until it is faced. Contrary to some beliefs, acknowledgement is a powerful tool and the most important step in changing anything.

Now before I got further let me say this. During the last few weeks I have been accused of being “tainted” because I am fighting for my husband (who is black) to be freed for a crime he did not commit. Yes, we have been fighting for 20 years as of last month. But what anyone on my journey can tell you is that I am not bitter. I do not believe all police are bad or that all white people are racist or even that racist people put him in prison. I want to clear that up because I take pride in being unbiased (as much as I can be) about this situation.

I know it can be a tough pill to swallow. It has only been in the recent years I have gotten my mind around it. That is saying a lot. Now, it’s not that I didn’t know that racial inequity was around or that racism was alive. I did. But my argument was, hey, I made it as a single Mom with my husband in prison, raising a black child and being the sole income on a commission only job without having to dip into state funding for anything or getting any major financial help from anyone. And then going on to build a six figure biz and a thriving coaching biz. But the truth is, I had it easier getting to where I got than a black woman would have. That is just a fact.

For the people who say that there are opportunities everywhere and it is personal choice. Let’s be honest, if you are raised in low income with many family members you know in and out of trouble with the law and you are going to under funded schools and have less opportunity to partake in technology and more heavy energy around you then it will be harder. Forget the fact that you are judged on your skin color and that if you are a black male you are 3x (+) more like to be pulled over or stopped by police for any reason. I am not even covering all the ways. What about TV and the way black people are portrayed. The list goes on and on.

This doesn’t mean that life is cake for all us white peeps. I can tell you it is not always delightful but just know that if you had brown skin it would be much less delightful. In a recent study it showed that black men make substantially less than their white counterparts for jobs straight out of college. Same is true for black women compared to white women. Someone like Candace Owens would say that is because of affirmative action. Her theory is that they applied to “high up” and therefore could not compete and then equates it solely to money. As if only rich white kids are a part of that survey.

Am I making sense? I have so many people argue with me lately about their white privilege I am starting to feel like a broken record.

The problem starts way before college. It is schools systems and parents and society as a whole that paves the way for this to happen. And the cycle keeps playing becuase few of us break our energetic cycles. The first step is awareness and I think we are getting that now.

Don’t get me wrong, you have a choice. Everyone has a choice. That does not mean that we KNOW we have a choice or that the choice is the same across the board. But energetically is the best play to level the playing field which is why I drove in with both feet at an early age and it changed my life. I know I would not have had the success I have had if I did not begin to work from the inside out.

So let’s talk energy. So this thing is two sided. I teach a concept called being the dominant energy. So your energy is made up of all of your experiences up until now because your energy is a direct result of your perception. Your perception triggers your brain to think certain thoughts, take things certain ways, and process things how you have always processed them.

So let’s play this out. If the whole world changes but you keep seeing it through the same eyes that witnessed inequity or other problems do you think that you will ever find the relief you are looking for? No. And the problem is, no one really cares. Like that sounds harsh but let me explain.

No one cares because everyone is too busy saving themselves. And even if someone did care enough to give up whatever they had to in order to fully change your life the only thing they can change is the outside. No one can make you feel that connection except you. So that is where the work is.

Because waiting on the world to change will never work. There will always be something that won’t work, something that will bother you, something that seems wrong. That’s why changing you, your focus and therefore you reality is the best option. It’s what I am writing my current book about and am super excited about.

I teach law of attraction. And in that concept the idea would be to ignore racism altogether and it would not exist. For instance, I raised my son and never emphasized that. Of course, I did not have the generational energy handed down to me but no matter what I do not believe in being a victim. See when I heard those first words about law of attraction at 19 I knew I would never be a victim again.

Up until then I had been through everything from being robbed at gunpoint to being raped and a lot of things in between. I felt like life was living me. I was plagued with disloyal friends and being broke. I was at the bottom. I felt hopeless. So when I got a hold of those cassette tapes it was over. I was so glad to wave goodbye to being a victim. Because no matter how sorry someone felt for me it never stopped me from being a victim again. No one could do that for me but me.

So yes, we need to recognize and do the physical things we need to do to create a better world all the way around. Take down the statues and put them in the museums where they belong. Reallocate funding for the police department. Put money into schools. And do the inside work. It is where the physical work has to happen.

But what about the energetic work? See, every subject is two subjects. The lack of something and the abundance of something. Einstein said it best when he said that the problem and solution are not in the same energetic place. That means we can only focus on the problem (lack) until we find the solution (abundance) then we have to change our focus. If we don’t, we are doomed to continue to repeat the problem over and over as focus grows the energy.

Well meaning people will work to fix this racism problem ONLY from the outside, physical plane because that is where they think the power is. As someone does something they want they feel better and as a policy is changed they feel better. But what if we all started to take our power out of anyone else’s hands and decided to instead pave an energetic path to create what we want. No permission needed. No one can stop you. Not when you are energetically lined up. And don’t confuse that with the truth. Energetic alignment has nothing to do with truth per se. It has to do with individual truth not facts.

Becoming the dominant energy is a process that can take you from where you are to where you wanna go. The question is, are you more worried about truth or growth? Here’s the thing. Truth is subjective. We all have different truths based on our perception. When I figured that out I realized that I did not care as much about the truth as I did alignment. Because the truth is a moving target. The best I could do was become in alignment with myself so that my truth and my actions and my beliefs all matched. Then, I could become the dominant energy.

As parents we have a HUGE job. One that will impact your children forever. See, energy is handed down generation to generation. So we are all carrying the weight of our ancestors. We are carrying beliefs that are not our own. We are also carrying beliefs that we picked up along the way that no longer serve us. It’s time to decide to do the work of unraveling all of that so that you can not only live a better life but also be a light for others to follow.

The best gift you can give yourself or your kids is connection. You cannot tell them how to be connected. You have to show them by being connected. You have to do the work. This won’t all happen overnight but if you want a change alignment is necessary. Because one person in alignment is more powerful than a million who are not. So what does that tell you? You are one powerful motherfucker. Time to tap in.

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xx Rebecca

The Secret Key to Work/Life Balance

We are all looking for that right? As entrepreneurs the name of the game is hustle. We hustle all day and night to achieve the “American Dream” of owning our own business. It is a labor of love. Being a business owner is work. The problem is we are taught that hard work – physical action – is what will pay off. That struggle is an essential part of the process and being stretched too thin is inevitable.

The problem is the ones who are pushing that have two things wrong. One, they are not talking about the inside work. The pre-paving if you will. Imagine driving down a road that is filled with trees and rocks and all sorts of things to slow down your journey. That path would take a lot longer than if you drove down one that was pre-paved. It’s smooth and even though there may be a rock or two along the way the major issues are fixed. That is what lining up energy does for any undertaking.

The second thing they miss is that when energy is aligned you begin to get inspiration and that inspiration, when followed leads to big results. I could write a whole book on that and sort of am (so be on the look out). Inspired action has largely been the reason for my success over the years. Moving when I felt the need to move.

Yet even working in the flow causes a problem for the ever elusive work/life balance. Because the flow is directed from the inside, if you will and work/life balance, the way it is presented current day is a structure to be held to from the outside. I hear coaches and other gurus say they have the cure, they can tell you how to achieve it and I am here to call bullshit. As an entrepreneur there is a very slim change you ever really achieve work/life balance and….that’s okay.

Let’s breakdown work/life balance to really take a good look at it because understanding what you want, not just trying to do what other people are “saying” they have is important. So what would work/life balance really look like? Maybe if you are a 9-5 worker who comes home and completely turns off….maybe you have a shot at what most mean when they say work/life balance. You wake up, go to work, leave at 5, come home, spend the evening relaxing or do whatever you want to do, then wake up and do it again. Weekends are made for relaxing and hanging out. You may actually have (daily) work/life balance.

That’s what they mean by the term “work/life balance”. It’s a daily thing right? It’s about putting ‘standards’ and rules in place to ensure you get your work done and show up for life too. But what if that term was just another way you are using to torture yourself with by comparing yourself to someone else who may or may not even be living the life you think you want?

I realized that the only balance there really is, is energetic balance. That balance is what you actually need. And you cannot get it by working x number of hours and then doing “life” x number of hours in perfect harmony. You get it by following your bliss. You get it by taking inspired action. And inspired action doesn’t always fall into a pretty little box. Every get an inspiration to call someone and it was just the best conversation ever? Right. Well what about when you call someone because you “should” or worse, you ‘have to”. Those conversations may not go as well or may be less in the flow.

What I’m getting at here is that life/work balance is more about the energetic dance you do vs the action you take. We keep trying to fit work/life balance into this daily formula. As entrepreneurs especially we try to set these boundaries to force us to look up from the project or client or launch we are in the middle of to prove we are decent human beings and we do care about others. But if we listen closely and remove the judgement and guilt and shame and “shoulds” we could feel the natural flow. And I hate to tell you it may not look like what everyone else is doing. Because as a society we have been told that “this” is what’s good and “that” is what is bad. So we try to fit into those grooves.

When you step back and realize this whole life thing is a journey. This is not about today or what happened yesterday. We get to choose and the journey is long and never a straight line. So what if you stopped trying to create work/life balance and instead started to FEEL for the flow of life? Did you know that you would actually get more done in way less time if you moved when you were inspired.

What happens though is that we are in the middle of a movie with family and it has to be “family” time so we ignore the impulse. And listen, I was an all-in Mom so I completely get it. I am not saying to not have standards or to ignore people in your life. I’m saying, show up when you feel it. Do the work to get to that point so that when you show up you are present and at your best. And then get in the flow and follow the inspiration and be present and at your best there.

Stop trying to fit into all their fucking boxes. Create your own boxes and find the flow and harmony in that. There is no one right formula to make your life “balance” from the outside in. What if instead you become a passion-a-holic? And inspiration-a-holic. Someone who is so obsessed with being in the flow that you follow that.

Because here’s the thing, you will be the best for others when you are in that space. You will grow your business or make the connections faster when you are in that space. That space is where all the magic hangs out. When I was growing my real estate business to six figures in just months I did it with inspired action and still made it to every football game my son played at college in a different city. The secret key? Flow. Alignment. Inspired action.

There is this saying that I heard on several occasions from Abraham-Hicks. One person aligned is more powerful than a million that aren’t. Stop trying to fix your life and instead look for the flow. Under commit so you leave time for the flow. In order to do that, you have to release obligation, which is, by the way, my least favorite thing. To feel obligated makes me want to throw up and revolt against the powers that be, whomever that is.

Take inventory. What are you doing in your life right now out of obligation? It is almost impossible to any alignment, flow or balance when you are working out of obligation. Let other people off the hook and let yourself off the hook too (you do have to do both in order for this to work). Because when you release the obligation you allow in more space for inspiration to find you.

xx

http://www.shesunoffendable.com

Loving a man sentenced to life in prison without parole

Someone asked me recently if I always believed my husband was innocent. The answer is yes, always. I knew it from the beginning when the detectives knocked at the door. So keeping hope alive during the trial, even though difficult, felt bearable. We were sure he could not and would not be convicted. There was no way. No physical evidence. Horrible “witnesses” who changed their testimony depending on which statement you read. Nothing to tie him to the crime except the corrupt police department that manufactured and intimidated their way to a guilty verdict.

When the jury went out we were hopeful. They were out for 3 days. The public defender we had at the time said that was a good sign. That there was reasonable doubt. And there definitely was. On the afternoon of day 3 they came back and announced they had a verdict. We were so sure it would be not guilty. By this time I was back in Florida at work. When the lawyer called to tell me that they had come back guilty on all counts I was beyond devastated.

There is this crazy feeling that comes over you when you know someone is innocent but you see that the government is stronger than you and you cannot do anything about it. There was no one there to help us figure out what was going on. My husbands convictions carried a mandatory sentence of life without parole. Meaning you will die in there before they let you out. It was unthinkable. And definitely the worst possible outcome.

At first we had some faith in the attorneys appointed to him but they all turned out to be overworked and underpaid and really just checking on boxes to get things filled out and done. It was a harsh reality we had to face. I knew if I stayed I would be living on hope and prayers because he had no out date.

I find it so odd that there are innocence clinics and all this help given to death row inmates, and rightfully so, but life without parole is a death sentence too. Why not employ the same help for them? Anyway, that’s just a side thought.

So I’ve been asked a lot how do you manage being with someone for 20 years and them not having an out date. The best answer is soul love. That soul love we have and have had since we were just kids running around together is solid and strong. It’s big love. It is the kind that demands you listen. It’s the kind and fills you up and always lights the way back if you get lost.

But that love has to have some other things for it survive. First of all, before I get into that let me say that I am talking about a faithful relationship. I do not have men (or women) on the side. I am 100% faithful to my husband. No funny business. And to be honest, I think if there was we wouldn’t have lasted this long. Thank God for phone sex lol. But let’s be honest, it’s all we have had over the years. And who gets to say that’s a bad thing? The amount of judgement I had to learn to release was overwhelming and surely would have taken me down long ago had I not figured that out. And I am not sure of the formula. I just know that when the pain gets big enough you figure it out as a matter of survival.

And even then it is two steps forward one back. Because it doesn’t happen overnight. There are periods of wondering what the fuck you are doing. I questioned myself and sometimes still do although now we are so close it is much less. There is shame and guilt that has to be dealt with. Our society shames prison and anyone who has anything to do with it so you really have to find yourself before you can find your strength there.

I had to start living my life. I know it sounds hard or maybe even obvious but it is easy to make all your plans around their out date. When you don’t have one those plans are stalled indefinitely. You have to take the vacations and buy the house and do all the things because life is too short to put it on hold. Plus waiting for them will bring you a slow death. I like to say waiting with him but still living. It is so important to still have friends and build your business or find an hobby. Do things that you find joy in.

I had to decide how committed I was. It matters. A weight like this requires a firmly rooted love and commitment. This may seem like a no-brainer but when it comes to loving someone with a life without parole sentence you have to be all in. Because it’s easy to be knocked down. Another appeal or court ruling not in your favor. When things get tough and you know it would be easier if they were here.

Even though I knew my husband was not guilty I still got mad at him for not being here. For wanting to go on the trip in the first place or for making any decisions that put him in the position that he’s in even if they were innocent decisions. The anger phase of a sentence like this is real. It is hard. It will test the strength of your love over and over.

The biggest thing I did was to find my connection to my higher self, the Universe, God. That is a missing piece in so many relationships because we take for granted being able to get our fix from someone else. The person who comes home every day and does life with you. What I noticed after my husband went away is that I was no longer able to fill my cup through him in that way. You know in relationships of all kinds we tend to fill our cup or empty it based on how others show up in our world. If you argue, you feel bad. If they are adoring you, you feel amazing. Well, when he went to prison all he could do was say nice things on the phone but it wasn’t the same and wasn’t enough. I needed to find my footing. I needed to find my connection to myself, my soul, source energy.

That is where the work came in. I had to look inside and start to figure out what was going on with me. I couldn’t keep holding myself hostage to his feelings or any one else’s for that matter. It took time. It didn’t happen over night. We had to work at it. I am lucky to have a man who loves me and is always willing to be open minded and reach for more with me.

There is no chance I would have stayed if he wasn’t willing to grow and actually become more. Because the thing is, he is accountable. Not for being arrested but for energetically being in the proximity. I never felt bad for him or felt like “poor him”. We knew too much to stay in victim mode. It was time for creating new opportunities not being upset about what had happened. There is simply no power there.

Since I always knew he was innocent I guess I have a different road than someone who is with someone in prison who did it and is rightfully sentenced. I can’t imagine that and don’t want to. Hope, then belief, then knowing he would be free before we saw the proof has been what has kept me warm at night since he’s been gone.

I also had to let go of what I thought my life was supposed to look like. Letting go of what society said my life should look like. Digging deep and figuring out what I really wanted and who I really was outside of his sentence. Once I figured that out I started to chase that. To find my happiness. To feel whole.

Because the truth is you don’t need any other person to find your wholeness and your connection. When we decided to let each other off the hook for how the other felt it was life giving. Coming to your marriage at 100% is the best gift you can give to your partner.

The reality is I always knew I would spend the rest of my life with my husband. I didn’t know we would have this particular situation but I know it’s an opportunity to grow into more and to evolve. It’s the journey. And I don’t say that lightly. We just decided that our journey was going to be as happy and joyful as we could make it. That decision was the best decision we made for our marriage. It led to all the other things that have kept us solid over the last 20 years and continues to keep us moving in the direction of freedom.

xx Rebecca

Are you seeing the signs?

Nowadays this is a big thing. I suppose it always has been. A sign from God or a sign from above. There is a lot to decipher about signs because well, our ego likes to fool us into thinking that things that are not signs are signs. We have used the idea of signs to cover our own inadequacies for decades by theorizing that maybe lack of desire is a sign when really it’s just procrastination and unhealed wounds. So let’s get into what is a sign and what is not.

First of all, I believe that what we ask for we get. If you are looking for a sign then set a clear intention to see it and understand it. I always add in the understand part because sometimes we don’t see them. We don’t understand what we are seeing. And to be honest, signs are only good when you are in tune with yourself and your body and open to receive them.

When you ask for something it is created. Even when you don’t ask and you just have a bad experience you ask for it’s equal opposite. That is happening all day every day. So you are expanding on the non physical side by your interactions with life in this physical world. Knowing when you are aligned and getting a language together with the Universe is really kinda cool.

The truth is everything you see you give meaning to. So you are really the one creating the sign. For instance, I have been seeing numbers line up when something good was happening or when I was in the flow since I was in my early 20’s and started this work. Some days I would see the numbers every hour. Then as I expanded as a person my perception did as well and I would see license plates or get receipts with consecutive numbers. It’s important to understand that I am almost dictating the sign because now I have assigned those numbers to good things so the Universe knows how to communicate.

So the sign comes and then I take it and run with it. One thing about law of attraction is that celebrating at every turn is really helpful. It creates more to celebrate. So recently on this journey with my husband it became clear that 333 (+) is a number associated with him and the good progress on his case. Also 111 (+) but then I kinda feel like 1’s are angel numbers and always close by when good things are going down.

Here’s a quick story about how 333’s became the number for my husband or maybe even more broadly all good things. In 2017 I launched a course called ALIGN for Realtors. It was based in law of attraction and obviously for Realtors. I priced the program at $333. The program was 33 days long and had 33 people in it. It was all around 3’s. It was a huge success. I sold out and those 3’s kinda stuck with me.

Fast forward to early the next year. I just finished up round two of the course and had an inspiration to contact an attorney, Margaret Raben, who contacted over a decade earlier. I knew I could not afford her back then but since then I had created six figure businesses and was in a much better position to retain her. We spoke for an entire hour. I told her the whole story and she gave me some honest advice: hire an investigator. I told her I had one (who had not produced even 1 thing in a year) and she recommended a different one. A woman named Vicki Yost. My first sign was in her phone number. It was xx3-333-xxxx. I noticed it and smiled then gave her a call.

That call was life changing for our case. I could write on and on about Vicki and her integrity and work ethic. She is my personal angel for all the work she has done for me. She did not take my case lightly. We did it step by step. Small review of pre trial docs, then once she was satisfied she took a bigger retainer for the trial transcripts and then when she saw that I was not crazy and there were multiple issues she took the case and began to investigate. Once she got some major pieces of evidence to prove my husbands innocence she schedule to speak with Raben. We happened to be on the phone when she was driving there and when she pulled up she began looking for the address. “333” she murmured. I almost fell on the floor before I asked her if the address was 333 and she said yes.

Now I had really latched on and the Universe is now responding even clearer with messages. Finding new and surprising ways to bring me 333’s. I probably don’t have to tell you but when she got out of the meeting and called me to tell me what happened….you guessed it…it was exactly 3:33. This continues to this day. Anytime we are getting a call or news I see the 333’s in some way. When I went up to meet with our current attorney we had another experience. Vicki, by then, knew about my 333’s but honestly thought I was nuts. When we walked out of the meeting with the attorney we currently have, Vicki asked me what time it was and….well you know…it was 3:33.

The other day when I checked my bank account I had $333 pending withdraws and another time I had 33333 on my odometer. I see it on license plates and on receipts. I see it on clocks in TV shows (only once but it happened!) and in other places. It is always around a new update or something to do with my husband. The day before the last amazing update about my husband’s case I saw 333 on the clock and my pedometer and 11:11 and 1:11. These are all signs so I knew something was brewing. Sure enough the next day I got a call. But even if I didn’t get a call I would still know. I use the signs to sure up my energy not to keep score of what’s happening.

The thing about signs is that they are not just out of nowhere. Meaning you are seeing signs that have meaning to you and as you start to assign more meaning to certain things the Universe gets better and better at communicating with you clearly. So get excited and make the connections to signs and events so that you can start to get all the signs the Universe can deliver. And trust me, the Universe can be very creative!

A last note on signs. Ego will try to give you signs that are based in fear. Fear is not a sign. Even when the Universe is directing you away from something that will be bad for you it is not a bad feeling until you don’t listen. Then it becomes a bad feeling. But fear is a trick of the ego. Not feeling motivation is not a sign either. It means most likely that you have either not healed from a past trauma or you are just not lined up with it enough. Stop taking signs that you shouldn’t and look for signs that you should or signs that are allowing and in the flow. Those are the breadcrumbs that will get you where you want to go. You can’t avoid enough things to make you happy.

First Blog Post….

Hey! Man I am so glad you are here and reading these words. For me and for you. I decided to start this blog for a couple reasons. One, I love video and do that whole social media thing but I also love the idea of having a place to just pour out my heart and extensive knowledge of law of attraction and how it can, in fact, change your life in ways you may not have thought of. I know that happened for me. So let me tell you a little about me. Makes sense for the first blog post, right?

I am a 40 something mom to an incredible 21 year old son and a mastiff mix that has stolen our hearts, wife to a husband who is in prison for a crime he didn’t commit and an entrepreneur. I have been studying loa (law of attraction) for 25+ years. I got my first set of cassette tapes when I was just 19 years old. I remember sitting in the parking lot, crying, thinking that if this COULD work, it HAD to work! I had to figure out how to apply it to my life and change. I was so tired of feeling like life was living me. This felt like I might have a shot at some control.

Fast forward 6 years and a knock at the door on a sunny spring day changed my life. When I slung open the door with our 1 year old son in tow I thought I’d see his face and instead my heart dropped. On the other side of the door was two detectives. They were looking for my husband (then boyfriend). I was confused, mad, and devastatingly sad. Why? Why us? Why him? Why was I left again, alone, with no one. Almost exactly a year later, to the day, they had his trial. With no physical evidence, no evidence from the scene, no scientific evidence and police officers and city employees who were happy to lie and cheat he was convicted and sentenced to life without parole.

As the attorney relayed the verdict to me I distinctly remember the feeling and even visual of diving head first into a black swirling hole of nothingness. We were sure they could not convict him. The three days the jurors took to deliberate strengthened our hope that he would be acquitted. Instead he was found guilty on every charge based solely on “eye witness” testimony. I use quotes because the testimony changed from the first statement to the trial and they had reason to lie.

Now almost exactly 20 years later my husband and I are still together. We have somehow managed this long distance relationship. Oh, did I mention we went up to his hometown in Michigan, across the country from where we lived in Florida, and that is when this all happened. So he is in a different state. At present he is almost a 23 hour drive away from where I sit and type this.

Since then I have raised our son, homeschooling him then sending him off to play D1 football on a full ride scholarship he earned. I created thriving six figure businesses in real estate and coaching and I FINALLY came across people in the justice system that were willing to help me and not just brush me off thinking I am just some crazy lady who wishes her husband was innocent.

So this is the journey. LOA. Prison. Raising kids. Finding yourself. Loving what you find. Releasing what no longer fits, or maybe never did. This is the journey of expansion. Of life. Of a love so strong that it could whether 20 years apart. Soul love. All the good things. Becoming un-offend-able.

xx Rebecca

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